I had a dream that I was recruited by the FBI. No, really. First I went to see this dude I went to college with in Boston (real life). He was doing stand-up comedy or something. Then I went... somewhere else. You know how dreams are. I couldn’t tell exactly what it was, but it seemed like it was a bookstore or library or something. I was pretty much by myself for most of this dream. There were no other significant figures in the sense of close friends or boyfriends or whathaveyou.
I’m in the bookstore/library and all of a sudden people are hiding in clumps. Like, a bunch of people against walls all clumped together. Apparently the FBI was coming. It was more of a recruitment thing though, like, they weren’t invading the building to arrest or kill anyone, but really just to check it out and see if there was anyone they were interested in. Apparently, that’s how they always did it. But, no one wanted to be recruited. That’s why everyone was hiding. For some reason, no one wanted to be in the FBI; they feared it or something.
I saw one person start running to the stairwell. They seemed to be pretty successful at their escape so far, so I decided to follow them. I got into the stairwell and started running down, but someone yelled my name and said that the FBI wanted to talk to me. I was like “fuck.” But I had no choice.
Next thing I know, I’m in this FBI meeting. Tons of people are there, like all of the FBI. Two older, conservative-looking women have taken me under their wing, for some reason. Maybe they were the ones that recruited me. A lot of people tried talking to me, they thought I was really cool or something (ha!). There actually were a good number of non-conservative looking fellas. Dudes with tattoos, hoodies, etc. So I guess it was a good mix.
Everything got quiet all of a sudden, and the “head FBI dude” got on the podium to speak. He was a tall, black man with really long dreadlocks. I think he had some gold jewelry on too. He actually looked a lot like the singer of Bad Brains. So he talked for a while and did acknowledge my presence. This whole time, by the way, I am still unsure as to whether I really want to be an FBI agent, but I guess I don’t have a choice about going to this meeting. Or maybe I am curious to know more. Or maybe just being polite. All of the above are very characteristic of me.
After the lecture I’m just roaming around and head FBI dude wants to talk to me. He’s all about me too! All these people are so pro-me-being-an-FBI-agent. And I’m just as confused in my dream as I am about this dream. So I’m walking around, trying to find this motherfucker’s office. There’s people everywhere, just lounging around and chit-chatting with each other. Remember, this is generally not a super-conservative atmosphere. This area in particular looks like more of a basement. So there’s these girls sitting around and I ask them where head FBI dude’s office is, and they’re catty as fuck. Hmm, jealous much? Can’t say I blame them. These chicks have been FBI agents for ___ years and there’s me, this dumb broad that isn’t really sure if she wants to be one, but everyone is all about me- and the head of the FBI department is calling me into his office to formally introduce himself!
So I go in his office and, just like everyone else, he’s all about me as a person and as an FBI agent.
So that’s that. I don’t know if I did decide to become an FBI agent or not, but apparently, they thought I’d be really fucking good at it. Kind-of reminds me of one of those superheroes that don’t know they’re superheroes, and they’re trying like hell to convince people that they got the wrong guy.
REFLECTIONS: So my head is in 2903802938 places right now. I’ll have to get back to you on that. Hint: I believe there’s some pretty awesome meaning hidden deep in this guy.