FUCK PEGGY MOFFITT- Introducing the TRUE "go girls!" of the week

Hey guys, check this shit out- you can buy traditional Mayan clothing for barbie dollls!

This ain't no mass produced, glittery-glitzy-pastel-pink-n-oops-my-ass-is-hangin-out girly girl clothes for barbie either- these perty outfits are handmade from the Mayan women of the indigenous communities of Guatemala using authentic designs and traditional Mayan fabric. Women who are trying to support their families in a very impoverished area (fuck Peggy Moffitt- these ladies get the true "go girl!" of the week).

Instead of donating your next $15 to a cute little star that gets hung with the other 100s in your local grocery store (and who knows where that money really goes anyway, hrmmmm?), why not get yourself a super adorable Mayan outfit for your cousin Betsey's barbie doll?


Now, that's some classy shit!

Traditional Mayan Clothing for Barbie

Ch-Ch-Chanel tats

Yep, that's me. Yes, that's real. No, it (surprisingly) didn't hurt. Yes, I am mildly insane.

Introducing Peggy Moffitt, mod fashion icon (and that's pretty much it).

While wasting far too much time googling random images with keywords such as "cute," "adorable," "uber girly" (yes, I have used that one), and "retro," I stumbled across this crazy adorable mod sensation from the sixties- Peggy Moffitt.

What to say about Peggy? She was a model and, much as I hate to admit it, no one's ever really interested in seeing what goes on in the head of a model. Their job is to "shut up and look pretty." And don't bother sending me nasty comments or hate mail for saying that. After all, the name of my blog is CYNICAL TRASH- I can be as jaded and non-PC as I want to :-p

HOWEVER- for those lovely people who are interested in learning about where this lovely creature came from, I did do a tad bit of research, all of which is very cliche. She was born to Hollywood parents, her father was a movie producer or something, she tried acting, was unsuccessful, and hooked up with dude photographer William Claxton. From what I have read, they did fall in love and manage to stay married though, until his death in 2008 :-( So Peggy gets half a point for making a teeny tiny scratch with her girly girl nails on "breaking" the cliche. 

Whatever, she had a great look and became one of the biggest style icons of the 60s mod fashion. That still gets a "go, girl" to me (although I'm crazy hesitant about awarding her the tag of "icon"). 

 Super artsy 60s Peggy Moffitt video montage, mostly inserted for entertainment value and "style points."  Complete with 1960s (ahem, terrible) music! 

  

  

lovebeautyglamor

Brit pop lovin' - again

If Brian Molko weren't so femme looking, he definitely would have been included in my Brit boy obsessed "boy crazy bullshit" entry. Fuck it, I'd still bang him. This band is sexy and beautiful. 

(Also, why am I not in this video?! [I ask myself that about a lot of things] )

Placebo- Running Up That Hill <3

Future husbands, take note

Except with real diamonds, of course.

The Misadventures of Miss Creepyton

About an hour south of Buffalo lies a cute little village- or community, if you will, called Lilydale. The really awesome thing about Lilydale is that it is actually a Spiritualist community. In order to reside in the Lilydale Assembly, you must be a Registered Medium. Kinda cool, yeah?!

I've gone to Lilydale for psychic readings a number of times. Take for it what you will, but I find the whole "psychic" thing intriguing, to say the least. Also, I consider myself a pretty spiritual person, but I am so not going there right now.

A few years ago, when I was making one of my trips out to Lilydale for a well overdue reading, I noticed a yard sale occurring at one of the fellow Medium's houses. Now, obviously I have to go to this yard sale, right? I mean, c'mon- a yard sale at a Medium's house? I'd buy something there just for shock value! And I did. I bought a random blanket, a totally worn-out book, "The Game of Life and How to Play It," by Florence Scovel Shinn (totally badass name, by the way),... and a really, really, creepy looking doll.

This not-so-adorable looking doll has traveled with me to two different apartments in New York. In both apartments, my roommates weren't exactly keen on this doll being in public display. Now, next week, I will be moving to Brooklyn and, I am sorry to say, Little Miss Creepy Doll will not be joining me.

It's been real, muchacha. But I'm sure you're not very happy living in one of my dresser drawers anyway.

Come one, come all, to the Ludlow Street free wall, if you'd like to own this not-so-cutesy-but-still-pretty-intriguing-yes-you-have-to-admit little treasure.

 

Ugh... and what is with those hands? Creepy as shit, doll (pun intended)!

Leave it to the M.A.C.

I'm not really a catalog person, but I've always been a sucker for sales. After all, I am originally from Buffalo, a working-class, industrial town. We're obsessed with clearance racks and coupon cutting (and there's nothing wrong with that, mind you!) So, when I got my Nordstrom's Anniversary Sale catalog in the mail a few weeks ago, I just had to do a little skimmy skim.

So here I am, skimming through page after page, circling the dozens of items that I'd love to buy, but certainly don't have the finances to do so anytime soon ( I don't even own an authentic quilted Chanel bag yet, one of my must-have staple items).

And then... then I get to the Beauty section of the catalog. Page 49 caught my eye with its display of this Nordstrom exclusive line by MAC cosmetics, called Cine-Matics. I love MAC (who doesn't?). Though I am deeply disappointed that their Candy Yum Yum lipstick sold out entirely too soon (and is now being sold on amazon.com for a whopping $75 or some shit, as compared to it's retail price of $14.50!!), I am obsessed with their highly pigmented eyeshadow and lipstick colors. And their paint tube works great as both a neutral-colored eyeshadow and/or eyeshadow primer (essential for those humid summer days in NYC where your makeup begins to melt before you can even get your coffee fix at the local coffee shop located two blocks from your house).

So I'm looking at this seemingly fabulous collection on page 49 and my eyes instantly fly to these fabulous brush sets that come, in true MAC style, in totally vibrant colors. Ladies, the selfish, beauty-obsessed part of me is hesitant to share these beauties with you, but they're just too amazing to be kept to myself. Ladies, get on this shit, and fast, because these cute little things are bound to sell out soon.

Given that most MAC brushes start at around $12, these brush sets are a steal for $49.50. There are two sets- an All Over Brushes, which includes 5 brushes, and a Face Brush set (which includes four essential brushes to make your face lookin' fab). I sat at my computer until 5:00 AM, eagerly waiting for the Anniversary Sale to start so I could place my order and then, being super fatigued (and I admit, a little drunkey), "mistakenly" ordered the wrong set. Then, of course, I had to correct my silly mistake by ordering the other one ;-) Duh!!

I'll let you know how these sexy thangs work out but, given that MAC has some of the most highly rated brushes out there, I'm sure they won't fail to disappoint!

Oh, and you can view the full Nordstrom's exclusive Cine-Matics line right here.

80s vids yay

Shut the fuck up, you know you love it.

filler v.239203238029

I've been posting a lot of bullshit lately. This, I admit. Keep 'em engaged by posting random vintage photos of pretty girls and epic music videos.

Fuck making excuses, here's my filler post. Twiggy representin' again.

There are absolutely no words that need to be said for this video, or this song. Here's to you, Dodger Daddy.

yessss!

duh.

The Twigster

Okay, so I understand that Twiggy gets a lot of crap for influencing so many adolescent girls to become anorexic. I also believe that she (and her little supermodel entourage) are to blame for changing the way supermodels look, and (unintentionally) promoting that uber skinny, "I wouldn't touch a cheeseburger with a ten foot pole, but if I did, you better guarantee I'd throw it up in a heartbeat" sort of persona. 

But, whatever. I still think she was an amazing supermodel. And I love that bitch's style- the babydoll dresses, the mod influence- I would love to be able to pull off a look like Twiggy's. And, something about those doe eyes and flirty eyelashes really snag a person's attention. Here are a few my faves.. 

Bondage 101!!

Project Cutesy-ness

I have a mild obsession with classy, vintage photos. In fact, I have an entire folder on my computer filled solely with tasteful, cutesy photos. I could have a field day creating post after post of adorable pictures. But, since I made a promise to myself to actually post more, I try not to bore you with 2083290382 pictures of... cutesy-ness (then again, who could oppose to seeing pictures of scantily clad, super adorable chicks?) 

Maybe I'll allow myself to post one each day. Yes, yes, there we have it- a cutesy/classy/adorable/tasteful featured pic of the day.

With that being said, here's today's- a cute lil' Indian chick with an adorable pose. And, we're done.

 

summer lovin'

Today it is hot out. Very, very hot out. Rather than bitch and complain about the weather, as I often do (and don't we all), I am actually fucking loving every minute of it. I definitely am a sunshine kinda girl and fully intend on owning multiple houses in tropical-esque lands, including but not limited to Hawaii (you were expecting something more obscure, I bet, but remember, this is just one of the many houses I plan to acquire).

Check out these lovely kittens taken from a 1977 issue of McCall's magazine. Sooo adorable. Sooo fun! I die to be a part of this girly fun. Courtesy of Blue Velvet Vintage.

Ode to Genesis (not a religious reference)

Genesis. Like so many other classic rock bands, I grew up listening to these guys. My parents even went to a Genesis concert for their first date- I believe it was the Trick of the Tail tour (or was it Lamb Lies Down on Broadway? I'll have to ask my Mom about that one) :-D

For the record, I am way, way, way  bigger a fan of early Genesis...but these late-era Genesis songs are undeniably fabulous as well.

And, well goodness gracious, the I Can't Dance video? I remember my Mom, sisters, and I imitating their super cheesy dance moves. Yeah, that's right. We rocked it. LOVE!!

The Genesis era I'm really all-the-fuck about, despite the videos that follow below (circa '73?)

                          

                                <3                  

 

                                          xo   

roots

I find this picture really sexy in a fucked-up, not-really-sexual-at-all way. Also, the source of this photo says that it is Black Flag, but I'm having a difficult time recognizing anyone. If anyone can confirm or deny said third source information, comment please!

 Ok, I just have  say- Raybeez, I really wish you didn't look like my ex-boyfriend

 

<3

boy crazy bullshit

You know, I'm really not happy with the way my crushes on English musicians have been turning out. About a year ago, I decided to make it my mission to make Matthew Bellamy fall in love with me and end up my, ermmm.. second or third husband. Then I find out he's dating that classy bitch, Kate Hudson, and I'm like, okay, this sucks, but I can deal with it. Let them have their fun. Then I find out that they're having a baby together. So then I'm like, well, this blows too- but mainly because I never imagined my future husband to have a baby with another girl. Then they got engaged, and, sigh, okay, fine, I'll give up on that mission. He's not hot anyway (that's right, I actually care about people's personalities more than looks people, I'm not as shallow as you might think)!

But let's go way back to my first crazy crush of an English musician- Damon Albarn. Love this man. Just love, love, love this man. I've had a crush on this cutie patootie since I was introduced to Blur when I was just a sad, pathetic, angry teenage wrist cutter (okay, that part I equally blame on hormones and Billy Corgan's depressing, angsty, "fuck the world" lyrics of The Smashing Pumpkins fame). I'm not even really a huge fan of Gorillaz- I just love Damon for who he is. See!?- true love. Now, if only I could break up him and his artsy little girlfriend, Suzi Winstanley, life would be grand. 

Too bad they have a little one too, named Missy Violet (I know, how cute is that). Also too bad that Missy isn't really little at all- in fact, she's 11 years old.

Fuck. Okay, who's the next best English pop rock front man I can snag? And don't say Jarvis Cocker, the singer of Pulp- he's totally not my style. Too nerdy, rugged, "intellectual" looking. I want a hot Brit with a sexy accent. Oh- an Aussie boy is acceptable too :-) 

 Yes, I posted this video. You know the song. You loved it, you couldn't get enough of it, then you were so sick of it being played repeatedly on the radio. Fuck it. I love this song and Damon looks hot as all hell <3  

 

My friend says that you could easily make these with glue, a broken mirror, and a pair of black stilettos. 

Well, I'm too lazy to try. But I encourage you to! My birthday? JUNE 10- it's coming up! ;-D

Also, I have an amazing idea for a blog entry later. I am determined to write it tonight! Crossing fingers. It has been too long.

Kittens & Tiaras--> COLOR ME NOW!

Inspired by my last post, Kittens & Tiaras, look what I found!! A fantastic clip art drawing of a kitten princess with a tiara on her head! Look at those sparkling eyes. Print it! Color it! Have fun with it! <3 <3 xoxo

Kittens & Tiaras

One day there lived a beautiful boy and a beautiful girl. The boy was a prince and they were childhood sweethearts.

They grew & they married & lived in an enchanting castle surrounded with glittering butterflies, lollipop trees, cotton candy, and teeny tiny little kittens. 

And then, one day, the prince cheated on her. 

The kittens & the princess were very angry & they rebeled. 

They lit the castle in firecrackers and flames

And roasted marshmallows as it burnt to the ground with her diamond-encrusted tiara intact. 

And she laughed and the kittens meowed 

As the tears streamed down her face.

the time bugs (a war between the hours of the day)

Fucking social networking sites. They drive me crazy. They're so goddamn addicting! Talk about a waste of time. 

Do you ever stop and think about how much time one wastes during the course of a day? It's too bad there isn't a device that records wasted energy, the way we can wear pedometers to tell how many steps we've walked throughout the day. I bet that if we were to invent said "pedometer for wasted time" the hours wasted (yes, hours) would be astronomically high. 

Although I hate video games and I try not to watch too much television- mainly because I'm aware that they're both such mega time wasters- I definitely can say that I waste way too much time on social networking sites. And for what reason? I find myself lurking on people's pages that I've never met- and honestly could care less about starting a relationship with. I spend 20 minutes looking through an old classmate's photos just for the sake of sheer curiosity.

I'm not trying to say that social networking sites don't have any advantages- indeed, they have many. However, it would be a complete lie to say that there weren't disadvantages as well. Have you ever thought about how impersonal we have become? We no longer need to directly communicate with each other- instead we rely on e-mails and text messaging. Rather than getting to know one another the old fashioned way, we just read the information provided on their facebook site. We google them. We read the comments on their networking page and their own responses to them. We form opinions, whether we admit it or not. We pre-judge.

What an effing waste. I should really start documenting how much time I spend on networking sites per day, but let's be serious here- that would fail just as quickly as my attempt at keeping a food diary. 

The bottom line, kiddies, is to remain aware of how often you use said evil time wasters. Every once in a while, check yourself- if  you realize that you haven't taken that piss you needed to take hours ago and your kidneys are beginning to hurt, it's probably time to take a little breather. After all, this is life. It'd be silly to waste it playing Super Mario Brothers all day long.

Roll credits. Play song.

"Half of the time we're gone, but we don't know where, we don't know where" 

Eat Dream Love

Eat it. Dream it. LOVE it. 

This post's limited word usage is acceptable due to the photo content. 

EVERYONELOVESPIZZA.

a winter-esque entry in MAY (thank you, rainy weather)

Today is stupid. 

 

Rainy days are getting to me, as shitty weather always does.

You know, the ol' Seasonal Affective Disorder thing (even though it's supposed to be MAY right now)? I never have formed a full opinion on that matter. Having a degree in Psychology, I am aware that every day we seem to be discovering more and more new mental illnesses, and I think it's getting a bit silly- we're becoming too obsessed with this psychology bullshit and are WAY too quick to overdiagnose / overmedicate the majority of the human population. Of course we would find a mental illness in everyone if we dug down and deep inside their soul.

At the same time, I am also the first to say that __________ disorder exists. Example: Adult OCD can definitely be a serious illness that can potentially take over someone's life. Same goes for ADD in adults. So I'm not saying that everyone's said diagnosis is bullshit- many people do indeed have a legitimate mental disorder (I don't know if it's the water, the air, both, or none). Being that I've spent many, many hours employed in various psychiatric units, I can tell you with confidence- yes, they can exist. Yes, they can cause mass destruction to one's life. I've seen it firsthand. I know!

However, I can also honestly say that I'm not sure how I feel about this whole Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD- how cute are those initials, btw) thing. As animals, isn't it natural that we feel less sociable and gain weight in the winter? It's like our way of hibernating- though we don't actually hibernate like animals, there is no denying that we do develop hibernate-like tendencies in the wintertime.

As humans, I don't think we're supposed to have the same amount of energy in the winter as we do in the summer. It's in our nature to be lazy during the winter- to sleep more and eat fattening, carb-rich foods- the human version of hibernation. And then we step on the scale, see that we're gaining weight and naturally, we get depressed about it. DUH.

I'm just not sure if I buy this whole Seasonal Affective Disorder thing and apparently, neither does the entire field of Psychology, since it's not listed in the current edition of Psychology's bible, the DSM (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders). I wish it were a real illness, as I could definitely benefit for treatment from it. But honestly, I just think that it's an "evolution" thing. As a solution, maybe we need to accept that we just can't be as sociable and energetic in the winter.  Or, another solution: move to California (which is my plan). 

The OBVIOUS symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder, per AltMD.com (and highly dramatic, if I might add)

love tragedy romance

Back in the day I was a music connoisseur. Well, okay, I still am, it's just that I am interested in becoming a connoisseur in 230820382039 other things as well. Let's just say that one of the first professions I ever wanted was to be a singer. I pictured myself rocking out in red sequins- evening gowns, leotards, whatever, as long as it had my staple red sequins all over it!

Then the world corrupted me and society told me "hey, it's impossible to have such a glamorous career! Go for something realistic, like a doctor or a nurse." And away went my dreams of becoming a singer. 

Since I was stupid enough to listen to said societal pressures, I did the next best thing- go to school for music business. That seemed reasonable, didn't it? 

Well, I ended up dropping out of school after about two years (what can I say? I was an angry, rebellious punk rock chick that hated school and anything authority related). But I was introduced to a lot- including the following song that I first heard in Music History class with the teacher that told me at the end of the semester, "you are a camaro with four flat tires!!" (I humored him by chiming in, "in the garage with a sheet over it.. right!?!?")

Dido and Aeneas. Dido's Lament. Love tragedy romance <3 <3 <3 Kind-of your typical opera theme, but whatever- this song is beautiful. I've always fantasized about this being my suicide song (but don't worry- I don't plan to check out anytime soon. It's just fantasy. Imagination! It's healthy, remember?) 

PS- Janet Baker effing rules

(I wonder when  my roommates are going to stomp into my room and yell at me for playing this song on repeat 23890232 times).

Bondage is fucking hot.

Barbie dolls. I fucking love them, despite how "un-PC" they are. After all, I am a fucking girly girl and always have been. Shit, I probably was attempting to manicure my nails when I was still inside my mother's womb.  As a child, I would try to get my sisters to play "house" and "office" with me. Unfortunately, both of my sisters were way more interested in going outside to play kickball with the boys next door. So that left a lot of time for me to play in my head. And along came the Barbies. I'll admit, I definitely played with my barbie dolls until an age that was probably considered totally inappropriate. But whatever, I turned out fine (I think). 

One of the great things about Barbie is that they never, ever fail to come up with new Barbie themes. In recent years, they've expanded their ideas even more, coming out with Renaissance Faire, Syndey Opera House, and Classic TV Barbie. So, I was pretty excited when I came across the limited edition "shoe fetish / dominatrix" barbie doll by the one and only Christian Louboutin. Check out that pvc outfit she's wearing! 

Surprisingly, these chicas are still readily available all over the internet- just check out amazon, where you can pick one up brand new for $189, or ebay, where they are currently starting at $162.

I notice that, while I initially created this blog for my own writing pleasure, I have posted way more random bullshit (i.e., photos, videos, etc.) than I have actual writing. I know I'm taking the easy way out- It's a fuck of a lot easier to post a quirky/sexy/obscene photo for one's visual pleasure and not have to say anything about it. The photo speaks for itself. However, I'm trying to get out of the habit of doing that. I mean, sure, not every single video, photo, etc., needs to have three paragraphs written about it. But the whole point of this blog was for people to get even the slightest glimpse of the inside of  my head (and trust me, there's a LOT going on in there). 

So, yeah, in the future, I am making a promise to myself to actually write more. Lord knows I need to let out even a smidgen of the thoughts that go on in my head. 

Lip tattoos.

Life's Essentials

Guilty Pleasures

You know, as much as this blog may portray me as a promiscuous, super sexual kinda chick, I'm actually a closet romantic. So there! I said it. I definitely fantasize about my wedding whenever I hear this song. But how could you not!? I mean, really- who doesn't like this song? <3

K-Ci & JoJo- "All My Life"

The first of what will probably end up being many postings of vintage beauty ads. I am, and always have been, sort-of obsessed with the old school marketing techniques.

awesome.

  Creepy Things That Zach Morris Does

Of course I had a crush on Zach Morris in high school (yes, high school, I got introduced to Saved By The Bell a bit late), but I was too enthralled with his dreamy eyes and crazy hairstyle to think about how he is, in a teenage boy's way, mildly creepy.

Psst- #4 is my favorite!